From Survivor to Counselor: Kelli Neel’s Journey of Strength and Advocacy

Kelli Neel’s life has been a testament to resilience and transformation. Once a victim of domestic violence, Kelli has turned her pain into purpose, becoming a counselor for women facing similar struggles. Her story is one of courage, survival, and determination to break the cycle of abuse—for herself, her children, and the countless women she now helps through her work.

A Love That Turned Toxic

Kelli’s relationship began like many others: built on friendship and shared experiences. She and her husband, Dan, knew each other as children, grew closer in high school, and eventually started a family. They faced early challenges, including raising a son with Down syndrome, which initially strengthened their bond.

However, cracks began to show as Dan struggled with his own demons. Alcohol became a constant presence, and his behavior became erratic and threatening. “He was drinking, passing out, and keeping me awake for nights on end,” Kelli recalls. The emotional toll turned into physical danger as Dan’s threats escalated to violence, including holding a loaded gun to her head.

For Kelli, the turning point came during a public outburst at a restaurant. Realizing her life was in immediate danger, she made the brave decision to leave. She called for help, ensuring her children were safe, and sought refuge at Christo’s House, a shelter for victims of domestic violence and sexual assault.

Finding Safety and Support

Arriving at the shelter was a moment of profound relief for Kelli. “It was quiet, peaceful. For the first time, I could sleep,” she said. At Christo’s House, she found more than a safe place—she found advocates who provided everything she and her children needed, from clothing and food to transportation and emotional support.

Acknowledging her abuse was another step toward healing. “To finally say, ‘This bruise isn’t a fluke accident—it’s intentional,’ was a relief,” she shared.

While in the shelter, Kelli received devastating news: Dan was hospitalized and dying from cirrhosis. Despite their history, Kelli faced the challenge of helping her children navigate their grief. She chose not to visit him in the hospital, understanding that re-entering his life could cloud the healing process for herself and her sons.

Breaking the Cycle

Kelli’s focus shifted to ensuring her children would not perpetuate the cycle of abuse. “Statistics say kids who grow up in abuse are likely to become abusers or victims themselves. I had to find a way to navigate them out of that cycle,” she explained.

Her journey of healing inspired her to give back. Kelli decided to become a counselor, earning certifications and volunteering her time to help other women. She now works at Christo’s House, providing the same support and guidance she once received.

Her firsthand experience has made her an invaluable asset. “I needed someone like Kelli who had been through it and could tell me how it really is,” one survivor said. Kelli’s ability to connect with women and children on a personal level has helped them find clarity and strength in their darkest moments.

The Emotional Toll of Abuse

Kelli often reminds others that emotional and mental abuse can leave deeper scars than physical violence. “It patterns your thought process in a way that makes you second guess every move you make,” she explained. This mental burden is one of the hardest parts for survivors to overcome, but Kelli is living proof that it is possible.

Her work is not without its challenges, but moments of progress keep her motivated. “When a mother tells you her child slept all night for the first time in months, that’s powerful,” Kelli said. “It’s what keeps you going.”

A Lifeline for Women in Crisis

Christo’s House has been a cornerstone of Kelli’s journey and the lives of many others. As a 36-bed facility, the shelter provides a lifeline for women and children who often arrive with nothing but the clothes on their backs. Unfortunately, the demand for services often exceeds the resources available. “For every woman or family we help, two are turned away because of lack of funds,” Kelli said.

This reality drives her passion for advocacy, not just for individuals but for systemic change. She urges communities to support shelters and resources for victims, emphasizing the dire consequences of inaction.

Looking Forward

Kelli’s journey from victim to counselor is a testament to the power of resilience and the importance of support. “If it hadn’t been for Christo’s House, I don’t know where I’d be,” she admits. Now, as a true survivor, Kelli continues to look forward, dedicating her life to helping others break free from abuse and find their own path to healing.

Her message is clear: “You don’t have to stay silent or hide forever. There is hope, there is help, and you can survive this.”

If you or someone you know is facing domestic violence, please reach out to a local shelter or crisis line. Together, we can break the cycle.